What do you do when life doesnt fit into neat categories? Take care, I was also living only maybe 10 miles from my very old grandma who lived alone, and I kept kind of meaning to go visit her, but its a lot easier to show up at work every day at the United Way, and get kind of righteous about all the people who work for money versus the rest of us who are working for the greater good, than it is to go to your grandmas smelly, weird apartment, and have weird conversations with an 88-year old, you know? Mahra:Ive been singing these lines from a song by the Avett Brothers to my kids for years, and it goes like this. This episode was wonderful, wasnt it? Its completely random. Kelly Corrigan:Like, Oh, well we still have sex, so were definitely not going to get a divorce, or you know, Oh my husband doesnt travel, so then were definitely not gonna get a divorce, or you know, I never smoked cigarettes, so Im definitely not going to get breast cancer. The words we speak, and the words spoken over us. Kilpy So, God is generous was my dads way of promising us a better future. If you haven't heard of Father Greg Boyle, let us introduce you: a Jesuit priest who has a touch of Santa Claus in his affect, Greg Boyle has collaborated with thousands of former gang members to build thriving businesses and communities of radical acceptance in East LA. Kate Bowler:I do think people offer certainties when they think that youre proof of something that scares them, and they cant just live in the uncertainty of not knowing for a minute. She was really, really into manners, and as kind of an act of gratitude, not in an uptight, British way, but as a Look at us eating a meal together, like, Nobody should eat before the last person gets down. Its what I said to my grad school colleague when she asked me if I planned to go into academia after we graduated. So, thats just the question in front of all of us. At a time when so much feels unex Shed do dishes all day and into the night to just get to listen to her children, just to get to watch them through a one-way glass, you know? Ive read Tell Me More twice already. Rocky is family, and we dont sell family, I replied. Kelly Corrigan:Hey, thanks for having me. Its probably cause of something youve been eating. Just see who you can bump into out there. Kelly Corrigan Wonders on Apple Podcasts Our family motto is, We dont sell family. When our dog was a puppy and being housebroken, he kept sneaking around piddling in the corners of rooms. Alex, He had things to do for days, and days, and days, and eulogies to write, and people to hug, and people to thank, and accounts to close, and cars to sell, and he had work to do, both emotional and just literally logistics. Kelly Corrigan:Ah, it was so terrible. This is the way this has to be, and its right there. I was wrong not to try to ease her days in some way.. I end up saying to my therapy clients, to my friends, and to my daughter both Change is hard and the stage-specific version of CIH, Middles are awful. Middles are awful: we have to either find language for an ambiguous state or give up on finding it: hard, sweaty work. Like the other day when I was being wheeled into a procedure, the nurse looked at my chart, and then casually said, Colon cancer. Describing the middle school drama teacher as the first person who believed in her, she imparts her gratitude for him coming to her defense as a young student. Go get mixed up in something. Find me online at @KateCBowler, and Id love to hear what you think of this episode. Kelly Corrigan Wonders: Everything Happens for a - Apple Podcasts Kelly Corrigan is a New York Times bestselling author whose first children's book, Hello World, is available now. They thrill, and confound, and circle, and overflow, and disappear, because its like this, having a life.. RELATED LINKS Try this episode's happiness practice: 36 Questions for Increasing Closeness Read Kelly Corrigan's new book, Tell Me More Transcript Society & Culture English Mahra:Ive been singing these lines from a song by the Avett Brothers to my kids for years, and it goes like this. The Best Show with Tom Scharpling. I think we should be talking about five percent of the time. On Sundays, Kelly records a special podcast called, "Thanks for Being Here" where she reads the toasts and tributes that listeners have submitted about those they love. Kindly, Kelly Corrigan:The magic of Tell me more is you start telling me what youre upset about, and I fall for the first thing you say, and I start solving for that. After a College Applicant Hits 'Send' - The New York Times Maya Shankars Plus One is Christy Warren, a former first responder with 25 years of experience in the field. Thanks for sharing, Diane! A former newspaper columnist and four time bestselling author, Kelly wonders about loads of stuff: is knowing more always good? The space between doubt and belief is often unpopular, but the tension can be held. Kelly Corrigan:I didnt die. Youre going to slide around, you know, youre going to deserve your life a little more some days than others. I should not be mad about this. Is this how you would have cared for my son?, and you end up fixating on all of these tiny little things, and at the same time, so overwhelmed by not being sure if its trivial or tragic. A phrase that I heard at a recent Pecha Kucha talk from a woman who had come through a terrible health crisis was Its like this now. Kate Bowler:Im Kate Bowler, and this is Everything Happens. Oh, The People You'll Know!. Graduations, diminished though they may Kelly Corrigan:So, my dad died in February, and then my friend Liz, whos the mother of three kids, 8, 10, and 12 at the time, died that December. Kelly Corrigan:My instinct is to fix, cause I feel Im almost sure I can. Onwards, but you use it so beautifully when youre talking about Lizs family and how they are now. I didnt engage with her. Kate Bowler:You put in a strong argument, if I may say it like that, for just being close to one another. Kelly Corrigan:I sat at my dining room table, which is place I never write, and I thought, Oh my God, of course I know exactly what this is. Onwards, but you use it so beautifully when youre talking about Lizs family and how they are now. Kate Bowler:Well, the one that we sort of settled on most was, Dont let the turkeys get you down, cause we were all deeply unpopular children, but it did make me think about mottos, and how it sort of defines the season that we live in. Kelly Corrigan:She cant wear half her clothes because she cant zip them by herself. Kilpy You dont have to bring it all. It was because I had been selfish, and my dad caught me. So, I really appreciated the way that you framed the bigness and the smallness of it, because it has to be both. I went to see her one time.

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